Alien Abductions and their mystery revelaed...

        Hello people, I apologize for the long absence of sensational blogs on my post. I owe this absence to my 2 year long wondering about why UFOs are sighted only in certain countries in the world that start with (U like You-As-A, You-Kay). ahem. I don’t want the See-Eye-A to come knocking on my door steps for mentioning the countries that they operate MAJORLY in, and hence am not naming these countries as is.

So, I have come up with the following reasons till now:

1. People there are highly talented computer specialists who think that all air crafts should establish some sort of an authentication mechanism. Something like the Kerberos protocol, announcing and authenticating their identity to the people watching from down below. Since they do not authenticate themselves, those air crafts are unidentified? Hmm..

2.  People there really can’t tell the difference between a flying saucer and a flash light ejected from an aircraft which gets caught in a small twister in the sky.

3. See-Eye-A is secretly mass testing their newly developed drugs on the locals in the area which can explain the mass hallucinations and delusions.

4. SETI, not getting enough funding from the government is secretly taking advantage of the See-Eye-A testing and also switching on powerful spotlights in the sky to help jazz up the mass delusions.

 

5. Government thinks by faking life on other planets and then trying to cover it up, it can arouse mass curiosity in life on other planets. There by subconsciously letting people be comfortable with the idea of life on other planets. And thus one day, evacuate the rich to another planet and leave the poor on this dying planet..! Remember the flick '2012'?

Wait, what? Is our planet dying? I dint know that!! Where’s my research assistant. Geez, she’s always on the phone!!

6. People from the future found a way to travel back in time and have traveled so with their advanced holographic devices to scare the crap out of their ancestors… Very plausible.

7. Aliens are interested in fair skinned English speaking populous. Those bloody alien racists!!

8. Aliens were in invisible cryogenic hibernation and all the drug testing by the See-Eye-A reacted with their cryogenic chambers and they are out there high on LSDs? !!

Maybe its time for a new research assistant…

9. Aliens are our creators who find the white people to be sunlight deprived (pale skin).  So aliens abduct them and give them a powerful doze of Vitamin D and release them back?  That explains the bright light that is used to abduct people, rich with Vitamin D.

 Dear reader, please spread the word that the post for my research assistant is now officially open!! Vitamin D! who hired her!!??

Anyway, all these above points point to only one thing, that I am about 9 points away from knowing the truth, the truth which is out there... starring straight at me right in my face, right there, a little to the left.. yup, right there… 

We now know we are not alone. But my question really is, why we (Asians, Africans, Russians, and Arabs) are left alone. If the alien abductions were real, and the governments of these countries whose names start with “U” are hand in glove with the aliens supplying them people for testing the latest alien drugs, why have they not told the aliens about Taliban? Why not have those terrorists abducted?!! 

Oh wait, they might be scared of Taliban joining hands with the alien government and waging a war on all countries where women are allowed to wear pants or jeans.. Not good.. Good call, Mr Presidents of "U" countries. But its still wrong that you are supplying your own citizens as lab rats to those aliens.

Time to take my leave, will write another wonderful article soon. Till then, remember to brush your teeth.. twice.. everyday.. We don’t want the aliens to not abduct us because of bad breadth now do we? Ciao…

They are watching us...

  

                                                                                                      And so are we... ;)